Optomistic Zumba Queen

I got on the scale this morning, and I’d lost 2.8 pounds. Very happy, indeed, to finally see the graph lines move south. My last weigh-in was two weeks ago. I generally like to weigh every other day, but that requires remembering before food or beverage passes my lips, because I certainly wouldn’t want a sip of water to tip the scale. Plus, the scale is downstairs and it’s cold down there and I always weigh in the buff – so you see the dilemma. Still, I have only been back in my regimen for three weeks, and I’ve kept up with my Zumba classes, so I’m satisfied.

It’s been hard to get back into the exercise routine. I first started classes back in 2011 when I weighed about 240. It was hard, but I learned to really like it. I used to stand in front of the two foot section of wall that was between the rest of the mirrored wall – so I wouldn’t have to look at myself. Surprisingly, it took only a couple of weeks to learn the routines. I would watch the petite, fit instructor and as we both moved in time to the music, I imagined I was inside of her, light and able. Sometimes I actually felt that way.

By 2012, I was a Zumba junkie and knew that my Inner Disco Queen had finally found an outlet. But then came 2013 and difficult, difficult times with my therapist. With our relationship. I was depressed and in pain. I didn’t have the energy or motivation for Zumba. The only thing that felt good was food. And I didn’t care. Boom. Twenty pounds.

So, here I am in 2014, feeling more hopeful with a new therapist, determined to get back to healthy eating and Zumba. I know that when I exercise – even just take a walk – my mood is better. I know this. I know that when I am at a healthy weight I feel more able to do simple everyday things. I know this. Hello, I say to myself. Pay attention. Do what you know works. Do it. Okay, already, I answer back. I will, I will.

Men often become what they believe themselves to be. If I believe I cannot do something, it makes me incapable of doing it. But when I believe I can, then I acquire the ability to do it even if I didn't have it in the beginning.  -Mahatma Gandhi

You can do what you have to do, and sometimes you can do it even better than you think you can.  -Jimmy Carter

Do it!

P.S. Want to know what it feels like to be overweight and do Zumba? Next time you’re in the grocery store, pick up two 40 pound bags of dog food. Then try dancing down the aisle to Lady Gaga’s “Born This Way.”   Seriously. That's exactly what it's like.