Friday, January 31, 2014

10,000 Volt Flashback


Yesterday I received an email from oldT. I’d requested a 2013 statement for my taxes and she replied, writing that she’d send one as soon as possible. I hadn’t been sure she’d respond, so seeing her name pop up in my email sent 10,000 volts of memory and pain through me. In an instant, I was sobbing. Strobe lights of rejection pummeled my heart, memories so fresh, they might have happened yesterday.

Through tears, I tapped a text to T. She tapped back: try to keep your power; don’t give it away. But I felt powerless. Be a champion, T texted. She beat me, I wrote, and it hurts so much. Your little girl is awaiting you, T responds. I got nothing for her, I reply. She can wait, says T, until you’re ready. John Bradshaw writes about this, she adds.

I’m emotionally hung-over – still exhausted from the toll those flashbacks exact. Today I plan to immerse myself in a lovely, lavender scented bath – a place where I feel unconditionally embraced by gentle warmth – and read Homecoming: Reclaiming and Championing Your Inner Child by John Bradshaw.

Our sadness is an energy we discharge in order to heal. Sadness is painful. We try to avoid it. Actually discharging sadness releases the energy involved in our emotional pain. To hold it in is to freeze the pain within us. The therapeutic slogan is that grieving is the "healing feeling."  -John Bradshaw

Be sad -

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